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In the modern world we try too hard to understand the realm of the mysteries, as though they were something that could be bottled up and sold.

The ultimate initiation is that there is none.

Just you, yourself and your “I” on a journey that simply gets curiouser and curiouser.

If you take yourself too seriously, you’re lost.

But when you find yourself on your knees, that’s when you’ll be found.

Be simple.

This is the easiest way.

But as they often say in spiritual circles, the easy way is hard enough.

The question I ask myself is: how does one then co-create a business and a life with such an unreliable trickster as a partner?

And the answer comes that it is all accomplished in the dance of joys and sorrows, trials and errors, through the many hands of the goddess.

Be bold. Make your mistakes. That is fastest way to learn. The universe is not that delicate — it won’t break from your recklessness! Neither will you.

The more you try to be somebody the worse you’ll feel. Simply carry yourself from the inside, centered in your own power, in the grace of your being, fully present and unselfconscious. That is all it takes.

Be beautiful. Adorn yourself. How pretty you give yourself permission to be on the outside is a direct reflection of how pretty you feel on the inside. Allow yourself to be beautiful, inside and out.

Be ambitious. Dreams were made for chasing. Make them big. Make them worth chasing after. If you fail, fail gloriously reaching for the stars. You are never too old to concoct a new dream and chase after it.

Don’t linger too long over broken promises, hurts, and failures. Regardless of what you’ve heard, you don’t have to be fully healed to keep going, to be successful, to start over, or to be loved.

Healing takes as long as it takes. Don’t rush your grief. Savor it like the waterfall of blessed emotion that it is. Let it wash over you and cleanse you.

Always keep learning. There is always a new hobby, a new skill, a new language to learn. Take a dance class, a pottery class, an acting class. Engage your mind in something that keeps you curious, keeps you fascinated. But don’t get so lost in your mind you disconnect from your body.

Watch out for boredom. Actively be vigilant of when it sets in and do something about it. Brainstorm a 100 ideas and throw them all away and then come up with a 100 more until something inspires you. Then go do it.

The goddess lives within your own body, god is nearer to you than your breath. You didn’t come here to be disembodied and dissociated. Don’t get addicted to high places. Don’t fall in love with death. Keep your passion for life burning bright. It is a tremendous gift to be alive.

Don’t elevate neutrality for it can turn to apathy. Be emotional. Be angry. Be hurt. Stand up for yourself and for others. That’s how you know you still care. That’s a sign of life.

Don’t follow blindly the teachings of the past. They are no longer for you. The time for teachers is past. It is time to blaze your own trail, to offer your own gifts, and learn through your own undoing and becoming.

You have been well prepared for this journey.

Now — fly!

I can’t say that the past 365 days haven’t altered me deeply.

I don’t talk about it anymore but it’s deeply settled into my psyche as a sort of despair about the human condition and the cheapness of human life. And yes, as a near constant hum of survivor guilt.

Yet, I see holding on to hope.

In the middle of it all.

Somehow distance gives us a perspective that those up close and personal are spared from. And in being spared from it, they may just alter the course of history.

Amidst the vapid messaging of every life coach living their best life sipping margaritas on a beach, it is the that actually inspire me.

Live as much as you can every single day. You don’t know if you will have another one — or arms, or legs, or water — tomorrow.

Love your community. Help each other as much as you can, even at the expense of your own health and safety.

Keep building, keep creating, even if it will be gone in a day. Learn, study, pursue excellence in whatever you do.

Don’t let the bastards grind you down. Never let them make you believe you don’t deserve every right and privilege of any body else. You are worthy just by virtue of your humanity.

Cling to your humanity at all costs. Never give in to cynicism, despair or hatred. Fear and scarcity are the mind killers. These are the things that will ultimate defeat you and destroy your soul.

These are perennial philosophies at the root of every spiritual teaching.

The rest is mostly made up to distract you.

Don’t be duped.

We’re all going to die in the end.

But…

…are we going to choose to actually live?

If you’ve been raised in strongly masculine traditions the ways of the divine feminine may come as a surprise to you, and may even seem iconoclastic.

Whereas the masculine approach is defined by rules and explanations, the feminine is about permission and mystery.

Where the masculine approach focuses on discipline and denial, the feminine encourages rest and sensuality.

While the masculine has an answer for everything, the feminine simply returns the question to you: Let it be.

Naturally, regardless of gender, we have both energies within us. If we had no masculine structure, we would not be able to pay our bills or get to work on time. The masculine structure also provides the protection required in spiritual infancy by proscribing boundaries, rules, practices, and disciplines. It answers questions to satisfy the anxious mind in need of reassurance, to help it make sense of a chaotic world.

But in spiritual adulthood, it is time to wake up to the chaos for which there is no explanation and the grace that is utterly mysterious.

In spiritual adulthood, there are no more teachers, no more rules, no more boundaries, no more reasons, no more prophecies. Nothing is guaranteed. Nothing is known for certain.

Osho described it as the progression from yoga to tantra. In the highest tantra, life itself is the teacher and there is no more need for ritual.

The path of the divine feminine is about tuning in and start listening: to yourself, to your body, to others, and to spirit.

To be in full presence with what is, whether you like it or not. To be fully embodied. To be here now.

The path of the divine feminine is to be in tune with energy: 1) the kundalini shakti or Holy Spirit within, 2) Ma’at or the divine order of things, and 3) the celestial energies, spirits of nature and angelic beings that are here to help.

In this path, the temple is within, all is holy, and nothing is too sacrosanct to be questioned.

Spiritual adulthood does not have the outward trappings you are used to. There are no more costumes, no more churches, no excessively light voices, no rousing speeches.

In spiritual adulthood, you forge your own path, you make your own choices, minute to minute, day to day, as you come into the fullest expression of your unique soul design in the context of the challenges of this life that you have chosen for yourself for your growth and service.

In spiritual adulthood you allow yourself to be moved and guided by your own desire to experience and participate in this reality, to play your unique part, to lend your unique voice on the world’s stage.

In spiritual adulthood, you no longer shy away nor hide away. Because you are no longer afraid of the truth, or of ridicule, or of being wrong, you become curious about who you are and the world around you — and you no longer try to fit in because you know you already belong.

Just as your physical body needs regular maintenance and hygiene to remain strong and healthy, so does your subtle body as it is similarly susceptible to gunk, viruses and infections that can clog up your system.

Mastering the art of keeping your energy field clear and sovereign is a vital component of your spiritual development.

You live in a web of connections to other people, even when you are physically distant or isolated. This is especially true of the people you have strong cording to such as current and former lovers, parents, siblings, friends, coworkers, and yes, even clients. In addition, the astral world is full of thought forms and entities that essentially act as viruses. They can replicate themselves and hop from person to person. They can travel along telepathic “phone lines” to and from anyone who has your “number” (in a manner of speaking).

What this means is, unless you learn to “turn off your phone” you will be susceptible to the thoughts and emotions of the world around you.

These connections become especially egregious when someone astrally picks an argument with you and you find yourself sucked into a telepathic fight. This sort of conflict can make you feel angry, beaten, and drained without realizing why. Even worse is a full blown psychic attack when someone directs the full force of their rage or envy in your direction and actively wishes you harm. This can leave you in shreds wondering why you suddenly feel so depleted when everything was fine two minutes ago. A big part of maturing on your spiritual path is recognizing and shielding yourself from these astral influences and attacks, so you don’t end up spending hours in trauma therapy trying to heal something that isn’t yours to begin with.

Remember, cutting cords is not the same as cutting relationships. It is simply about maintaining energetic sovereignty within a relationship, akin to shutting the door to your bedroom when you need to rest, or hanging up the phone when you are done with a conversation.

An effective energetic hygiene regimen should consist of three components: protection, clearing and cultivation.

Protection 

As the old adage goes, prevention is better than cure. There are many ways to protect your energy field.

Fundamentally, it’s as simple as setting an intention. Intentions can be spoken silently in your mind, or out loud, or written down. They can be in the form of a prayer or invocation, and may invoke deities, guides or angels of protection, such as Archangel Michael, the god Ganesha, the four directions, or your power animal. They can be visualized, for example, by imagining yourself being zipped up inside a sleeping bag or cocoon, surrounding yourself with a golden sphere of light, or circling your home or your aura with a violet flame.

Other techniques may include drawing sacred symbols on doors and windows (either literally, or with a smudge stick, or crystal wand), and anointing entryways with sacred oil for protection. 

The basic principle is to set an intention for protection and then anchor it as fully as you can through words, objects, rituals and so forth. 

Clearing

Nevertheless, no matter how careful you are with your protections, all creatures love the light and all sorts of astral things will love to stick to you. You can pick them up during a tense meeting at work or a trip to the grocery store, anytime your aura is too open, when you’re tired and depleted, and when you’ve gotten yourself entangled in an argument with someone. 

Physical cleaning actually doubles as an energetic clearing practice: taking a shower, dusting and vacuuming, organizing and purging, etc. are all effective for breaking up pockets of stagnant energy in your home and your aura, and creating space for energy to flow.

Similarly, movement gets energy moving. Simply moving about the house (cooking, cleaning, tidying up) is often enough to clear out the energetic cobwebs. 

Beyond this, once a week or so, a salt bath, smudge (with sage or incense) and  sprinkling of holy or energized water can be for maintenance. Holy water comes from sacred sources such as rivers or springs. Water can also be energized with intention, ritual, moonlight, sunlight, crystals and so on. 

Sound is also very effective for clearing. You can use bells and rattles, buzzing, humming, singing or chanting. For my part, I love to play spiritual music or a protection mantra on repeat (such as the Vajrasattva mantra) while I clean to raise the vibration and ensure the sanctity of my space. 

Finally, visualization can be very beneficial as well, such as imagining your aura filled with pure white light, and releasing any cords or attachments, allowing them to fall away, as if you were a non stick surface like Teflon. 

Personally I love to use aura clearing oils on my chakras and creating sprays with them. 

For the more stubborn attachments, getting help from an energy healer such as myself, can be the best approach.

Cultivation 

Subtle energy must be actively cultivated and managed in the same way you rest and exercise your body to grow strength and support your health.

Yoga, dance, and breathwork generate life force, prana, that helps you not only clear your energy field, and elevate your mood, but also helps release tension or inflammation in the body, fight off physical infections, and so on. These practices can also activate shakti, the kundalini-fire-mother-dragon-goddess being that transforms and raises your consciousness, gives you increased magnetism and charisma, and reconfigures your physical body into a body of light.

Things that deplete prana include overdoing, overthinking, not listening to the needs of your body, being phony, and forcing yourself to do things you really don’t want to.

As they often say, the issues are in the tissues. Any time you raise the kundalini shakti energy, you access a greater degree of power to influence others and mould your environment, from healing your physical body, to manifesting your intentions, to attracting a following. The transformation and reconfiguration of your subtle bodies through this force also enhances your psychic senses and ability to access fields of information, such as the akashic records, that can increase your ability to effectively navigate through life. 

Breathwork practices that activate shakti are essentially rapid breathing practices, such as kapalabhati, bhastrika, holotropic breathing or the Wim Hof method. Plant medicine, invocations, mantras, ritual, and anything else that solicits help from higher spiritual beings additionally gives you access to the shakti of those beings. 

Activating shakti is like busting out the power tools. This gives you more power to clear and release blockages and attachments, especially those that have become embedded in the physical body.

However, as with any physical exercise program, go slow and build your capacity gradually. Purification can be an intense process and can occur in the form of vomiting, headaches, stomach pain, seizures, shaking, shivers, tears, rage or even laughter. Too much shakti can also overheat the body and increase inflammation. Be forewarned and take appropriate precautions to test your sensitivity and make sure you have the time, space, and support you will need to get through the deep cleanse process once it’s activated. 

For myself, because I am highly sensitive, a little goes a long way. There really is no need for additional power tools if the kundalini process is already active and flourishing inside you. It has its own intelligence and knows how much you can take. The power tools are most helpful when you find you’re stuck or stagnated in some way, or dealing with something you need to summon all your power for. 

Here are some further references if you wish to learn more about these topics:

• Space clearing by Denise Linn: This is a lovely little book that can help you understand the importance of creating and maintaining sacred space in your home
• Energy anatomy and creating strong boundaries: Read Eugenia Oganova’s article on increasing energy flow within the vertical tube and toroidal field 
• Psychic attack and releasing cords: Steve Nobel has a wonderful library of articles and meditations to help you with this
• Managing kundalini: There is so much misinformation on this topic that I hesitate to point to an outside resource so I will add a link here once I get around to writing an article on it myself.

Trust me, getting good at parties will be most important skill you invest in no matter what your lifestyle or dream is. 

You won’t ever hear anyone say it, but the most critical life skill you will ever develop is being good at parties.

Hear me out. Your diverse network of friends and their wealth of skills, advice and support, are an immense asset to the life you will build: from the business you start in the future, to how you meet your future spouse, raise your kids, buy a house, deal with crises, find a job, passion, career or hobby, or go on vacation. 

And getting that diverse network in place has everything to do with how you socialize and make connections. Getting good at it is all about how you express your unique brand, how you charm and inspire people, and what makes you likable.

Many people make the mistake of expecting this skill to come naturally but I’m here to tell you that like anything else it must be developed and honed over time. A few bad experiences early in life or a difficult environment at home, can leave you with crippling social anxiety, and the feeling like you never quite measure up or are enough. But succumbing to this feeling and isolating yourself will only make it worse.

Identifying your unique party archetype will help you zero in on what you naturally do best, and hone it to stellar quality. It will also help you understand the type of party you would be most welcome at and the people who would appreciate you the most. 

Let’s break it down.

1. The Gloria

Maybe your unique contribution to a party is your appearance. Consider the elegant fashionista whose presence elevates any event she attends. She doesn’t need to be smart or funny, or even say a word. All she needs to do is just listen and smile. Her contribution is simply in her being — in her style, elegance, beauty, and glamor. 

2. The Professor

On the other end of the spectrum you have those whose greatest contribution to a party is their intellect. These are the people who command a rapt audience as they eloquently discuss the finer details of global politics or wine making, share a dazzling array of factoids, or expound on some obscure topic. Their unique skill is in making anything fascinating and palatable through their own interest and curiosity. 

3. The Artist

Here you have your singers, dancers and musicians who can take any party up a notch by setting the mood for good vibes. The karaoke singer with the incredible voice, the guy with all the moves on the dance floor, the pianist playing old favorites for everyone to sing along to, the singer/songwriter serenading you with her guitar. They create atmosphere and provide entertainment.

4. The Charmer

Your unique contribution is the warmth you bring to the room. You’re the kind of person who walks around greeting everybody by name, with deep eye contact and genuine delight, making them feel extra special by remembering details about their lives and asking questions about how they’ve been that reveal how much you appreciate them. You make everybody feel welcome and at ease — although you can be a bit of a social butterfly, flitting from person to person, not pausing long enough for a substantial exchange. Your unique style means you are adept at meeting new people and making them feel like old friends in no time.

5. The Comedian 

You are the guy with all the wisecracks and dad jokes, putting a smile on everyone’s faces, even if you sometimes make them cringe. Or you’re the stand up comic entertaining everybody with your stories, opinions and physical mimicry. You’re always welcome at parties — even if you may stir up a bit of controversy, you do it with flair and panache. Unlike our next archetype…

6. The Donald Trump 

Let’s face it: you’re obnoxious but people put up with it. You’re unapologetically yourself and give voice to the politically incorrect things that everyone’s secretly thinking. You’re not to everyone’s taste but you do bring an element of interest to any otherwise vanilla gathering. You walk a fine line between attracting fans and making enemies — sooner or later you offend everyone! But you get invited to parties because your confidence and penchant for trouble is a vibe that we all need a little of in our lives. 

7. The Adventurer 

This is the person who is always swooping in from somewhere and about to head someplace else. They elevate the gathering by bringing an international flavor and sense of worldliness, glamor, and sophistication to those who might otherwise live humdrum lives. Alternatively, they might be more of an outdoors type or thrillseeker, a spiritual tourist, or hippie, scientist or anthropologist. Either way, they embody movement, lifelong learning, willingness to take risks, and an openness to new experiences.

8. The Host/Hostess 

You’re the guy or gal who really knows how to throw a shindig. Maybe you’re a fabulous cook and throw the best dinner parties, or perhaps you have an amazing house with a view or a pool. Your home might be the place everyone loves to drop by and you often have impromptu gatherings. You love having people over and offering nourishment for the belly or the soul.

9. The Chameleon 

If you don’t naturally fall into any one archetype, you might be a chameleon. As a chameleon, you may be adept at mimicking your environment and can adopt any persona as the occasion demands. For aspiring Chameleons, it doesn’t hurt to add any or all of the skills mentioned above to your repertoire. Learn to cook or mix a drink, make an effort with your appearance, always have a joke, a story or a few factoids on hand to share, go on a few adventures and don’t be afraid of a little controversy. Be willing to look foolish on the dance floor or at the open mic. Make an effort to at least say hi to everybody even if it feels awkward or uncomfortable. Cultivate charm by reading the manual on How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. Develop the dexterity to blend in anywhere.

Whatever you do, don’t isolate yourself. This is an area of life worth paying attention to. Like everything else, practice makes perfect.

The goal is to be happy, not high

When you’re high, it’s a lot of fun. It feels so magical and wonderful to be in flow. But you can’t drive when you’re high because your judgement is impaired, you’re a hazard to yourself and others. It’s not a place to be making big decisions from. You need to be grounded and practical about the reality of human life when you make decisions.

The point is not to walk around wearing rose tinted glasses, the point is to cultivate  an inner glow of well being and clarity, to see the world as it is, not as you would like it to be, free of fear and conditioning.

Cleaning as a spiritual practice

Cleaning is such a great activity. It’s a devotional practice to your home.

When my house is sparkling clean, it makes such a difference to my energy and the energy of the space.

It is also great exercise – it keeps you moving in a way that burns the most calories (especially for women). 

1. Begin where you are
2. The universe is subtle but not malicious
3. It won’t be easy, but it will be magical
4. You’ll have to do the work
5. Envy tells you how badly you want it
6. You can’t always get what you want
7. When we stop growing, we start dying
8. Purpose is up to you
9. We all have the same mission
10. You can screw it all up

Last year, I channeled a workbook concept that I call The Wheel of Life. It was my first experience “downloading” an entire book in this manner. It was an idea that was tap-tap-tapping on my consciousness all weekend, and wouldn’t let up until I leapt out of bed on Sunday morning determined to get it out of my head and onto paper. I wasn’t able to stop typing until I had it all down, 12 hours later, still in my pajamas, having barely eaten more than a few snacks all day.

The Wheel of Life coaching system is essentially a synthesis of concepts borrowed from astrology, art therapy, and sacred ritual. The workbook guides you in creating your own personal Wheel of Life: a visual representation of your current life, overlaid with your dreams, prayers, and action plan, rendered in a form that is ancient, potent, ritualistic and symbolic. Your personal Wheel serves as a vision board, task list, and meditation mandala all in one. It is to be used and energized through a regular practice of gratitude and ritual.

Email me to get a free copy of the workbook if you’re curious to try it out for yourself.

The 12 houses

Each section of the Wheel (a house) can be thought of as a specific bucket of energy – an energy we need in order to thrive. That is why the Wheel is purposely laid out to give equal weight to each house. When all the buckets are filled to a healthy capacity, we can naturally expect to have a sense of fullness or fulfillment in life. 

The twelve houses in this system more or less map to the astrological houses although I took a few liberties to re-align some houses according to the quality of the energy they represent rather than sticking with the current canonical tradition.

In terms of practical application, not every house should be interpreted in the same way for every person. How a house is interpreted depends on the values, priorities and desires of each individual. The houses simply point to an energy. How that energy manifests will be unique for each person as every life is unique. 

Achieving balance

The Wheel is designed to help you find greater balance across your activities by identifying areas where you might be doing too much or not enough. Especially if you’re an overachiever, you might have found that there are times in your life where you’ve been so focused on your career or education that you have neglected your relationships. Or as a parent there may have been times when you became so overwhelmed by family obligations it affected your ability to relax and listen to your body. 

It may not always be optimal to live a perfectly balanced life at all times and this is okay. Balance may be achieved sequentially rather than all at once. At different points in time, one’s focus may need to be concentrated in a single area, or shift from one set of houses to another. The purpose of the Wheel is simply to make these choices conscious and deliberate.  

Especially if you are prone to the kind of anxiety that tells you you are not doing enough, you can use the Wheel to remind yourself that you are actually doing the best you feasibly can and have much to celebrate about yourself.

Surrendering to the mystery

All that being said, we would be wise to remember that not every life can be balanced across all houses. 

Some houses may be blessed with abundance for some whereas others may suffer from repeated disappointments and setbacks. It is natural and normal to have areas in your life where you feel stuck and exhausted. 

These are the mysteries of fate and destiny that our predecessors who developed astrology ascribed to the movements of the stars and planets. Whether you believe in astrology or not, it is important to recognize that in spite of our best plans and efforts we can only live our best lives within the parameters of the hand we have been dealt.

Since the Wheel of Life is a spiritual system and not just a psychological one, you are encouraged to “let go and let God” when you have hit a wall and give yourself room to breathe. In areas where things seem particularly stuck, it is often wiser to take a step back, rather than run yourself into the ground. In this case, it’s recommended to compose a prayer or affirmation, and shift your focus instead to something else that you can control.

A channeled message of hope during a time of despair

Not all people are good no, not all people can be saved.

Yes… take a deep exhale. Because… miracles.

Miracles are possibilities, they happen all the time.

I am here to give you hope. Hope when the walls rise up in every direction, and trap you inside, when there are no doors, and no windows. For those times, I am here to tell you to take a deep exhale and expect miracles. 

When there seems to be no way out and everything seems dark and cloudy and it feels like the end of the road, and there are only two possibilities: the road either goes on or you die.

It is just for those times, that I give you this hope: if you’re still breathing there is something for you to do here, and if you make your life about always contributing something then you will always have something to apply yourself to.

When I said, not all people can be saved, not all people are good, I meant, yes, help people around you, but be picky about who you help, and who you make friends with. Be picky about who your really deep close friends are, picky about the company you keep, picky about the influences you allow, who you give your love to, and what you let into your life.

What do you eat?

What do you consume?

What do you allow to hurt you or change you or destroy you?

You do have choices. What you choose to consume, what you choose to expose yourself to, the risks you choose to take, the part that you choose to play — these are all choices that are in your hands. 

You are not here to suffer. 

Yes, here is some suffering that is beyond your control. 

Every life has a little bit of suffering, some lives have a lot. 

But we can soften the suffering with our attitude to not grow hard in the suffering. I’m not here to tell you you can avoid suffering. We are here to do hard things and some of those hard things are not by choice. We are here to do hard things, the hard things that we put in our way, we are here figure out how to do them well, how to be strong and open hearted. 

What is strength? Strength is mental and emotional strength, to not fall into despair or depression, to keep going, keep loving, stay in integrity. Keep an eye on the bigger picture, to have a good attitude.

Remember how our job here is to not add to the suffering, to remember that our job is to bring the miracle vibrations into the world, into our lives and the lives of the people around us. Our job is to bring the good vibrations and as long as we can tune into the sun the sky the rain flowers trees there will be a balm for suffering, something to soothe us.

Tamam shud.